You're a smart, attractive person, so you wouldn't be surprised if one of your friends got the hots for you and then started acting all kinds of crazy。
你聰明，充滿吸引力，所以如果你的一個(gè)朋友迷上了你，然后為你做出一系列瘋狂的舉動(dòng)就不會(huì)令人奇怪了。
Your love-struck friend will wonder if you feel the same way, and will probably dream up subtle tests to find out. They could save themselves some effort by quickly surveying the scientific literature, though, because they will almost certainly be following one of seven well-trodden paths。
迷上你的那位朋友不知道你和他(她)的想法是否一樣，因此就想出一些絕妙的測(cè)試來(lái)驗(yàn)證。他(她)如果快速地翻閱一下科技文獻(xiàn)其實(shí)可以給自己省下不少功夫，因?yàn)橐韵逻@7條測(cè)試方法是很多人都會(huì)嘗試的。
In a classic study led by Leslie Baxter at Lewis and Clark College in Portland, Oregon, and William Wilmot at the University of Montana, Missoula, a team of researchers interviewed 90 undergraduate students about their relationships with people of the opposite sex。
來(lái)自?shī)W勒岡州波特蘭劉易斯克拉克學(xué)院的萊斯利•巴克斯特(Leslie Baxter)與密蘇里市蒙大拿大學(xué)教授威廉•威爾莫特(William Wilmot)聯(lián)合進(jìn)行了一項(xiàng)研究，他們?cè)L問(wèn)了90名大學(xué)生，旨在了解他們與異性的關(guān)系。
The interviewees admitted to a total of 158 "calculated acquisition strategies" or secret tests that they hoped would reveal how a fancied friend felt about them. Many of the tests were pretty similar, so Baxter and Wilmot were able to boil them down to just seven categories. Read on to see how infuriating, and downright calculating, friends can become in the pursuit of a relationship upgrade。
被訪問(wèn)者采用了158條“蓄意獲取策略”，也就是秘密測(cè)試，他們希望通過(guò)這些測(cè)試來(lái)探知自己喜歡的朋友是怎么看待自己的。大多數(shù)的測(cè)試都很相似，因此巴克斯特和威爾莫特把這些測(cè)試分成7類。接下來(lái)讓我們來(lái)看一看異性朋友為了追求一段戀情是如何讓人抓狂又工于心計(jì)的。
1. Endurance
This is most common type of test. In this category, the love-struck friend does their best to test the other person's feelings by fishing for compliments or demanding help 每 especially if it comes at a cost to the other。
1. 忍耐度
這是最常見的一類測(cè)試，在這類的測(cè)試中，陷入情網(wǎng)的那個(gè)人竭盡所能地恭維對(duì)方或者向?qū)Ψ綄で髱椭貏e是涉及需要對(duì)方付出代價(jià)的事情。
A classic endurance gambit is the self-put-down. As one respondent recalled: "He was really getting down on himself, saying he wasn't a very capable or nice person. He said it to get me to compliment him and verbalise how much I thought of him."
一個(gè)經(jīng)典的忍耐力測(cè)試開場(chǎng)就是放低自己的姿態(tài)。一個(gè)被測(cè)試者回憶說(shuō)：“他把自己位置放得很低，說(shuō)他能力不強(qiáng)，人也不好，他這樣說(shuō)就是想讓我夸獎(jiǎng)他，聽聽我是怎么看他的。”
Another type of endurance test is called forced choice, in which your friend wants to see if you will drop everything for them. "She came to where I work out and said that she was really depressed but didn't want to bother me," said one man in his interview. "She really wanted to see if I would stop what I was doing and show my concern, indicating how much I care for her."
另外一種忍耐度測(cè)試叫做強(qiáng)迫選擇測(cè)試，在這項(xiàng)測(cè)試?yán)�，你的朋友想知道你�?huì)不會(huì)為了他們放棄所有事情。一個(gè)男性受訪者說(shuō)：“她來(lái)到我鍛煉的地方，告訴我她很沮喪不過(guò)她不想打擾我。她非常想知道我是否能停下我手頭的事情關(guān)心她。”
Finally, enamoured friends will behave like spoiled brats, pushing their friend's buttons to see how much mistreatment they will put up with without complaining, will you still like them even when they're being a pain?
最后，迷戀你的朋友會(huì)表現(xiàn)得像個(gè)被寵壞了的乳臭未干的孩子，看看他們的迷戀對(duì)象在深受對(duì)方折磨的情況下還會(huì)不會(huì)毫無(wú)怨言地忍受——如果你的朋友是這樣，你還會(huì)喜歡他們嗎?
2. Triangulation
The second most popular type of test was dubbed the triangle, because it relies on the age-old saying "three's a crowd"。
2. 三角測(cè)量法
第二流行的測(cè)試方法就是三角測(cè)量，這個(gè)測(cè)試來(lái)源于老輩人口中的“三人不歡”。
Some people engineer "fidelity checks", especially if the relationship has already strayed beyond the platonic. One of the interviewees wanted to test if her boyfriend was as keen as she was. "I would intentionally leave him alone with my room-mate and then ask him when I returned 'What have the two of you been up to?' If he acted uncomfortable, I would know that he wasn't faithful or at least that he was thinking about being unfaithful to me."
一些人愿意做“忠誠(chéng)度測(cè)試”，特別是兩者之間關(guān)系已經(jīng)不再是純粹的柏拉圖式的關(guān)系。因?yàn)槭茉L者想知道自己的男朋友是不是如同她愛他一樣喜歡她。“我有時(shí)候故意把他和我的室友單獨(dú)留在一起，我回去的時(shí)候問(wèn)他他們兩人在一起的時(shí)候做了些什么。如果他表現(xiàn)不自然，我就知道他不誠(chéng)實(shí)，至少他想對(duì)我不忠誠(chéng)。”
Others employ jealousy tests: "I tested her limits by going out with other women and making sure that she found out about it. I wanted to know what kind of relationship commitment she wanted," said one man。
另外一些人采用嫉妒測(cè)試。“我和其她女人出去，并確保她知道，這樣就能測(cè)試她的極限。我想知道她想要什么樣的愛情承諾”，一位男性受訪者表示。
3. Hint, hint
Then there are the indirect suggestion tests: joking about serious feelings, hinting or getting increasingly intimate with bodily contact. "When we were just becoming romantic, he kept getting more and more bold with his touching, first his arm around my shoulder, then moving in real close, etc. He was waiting to see if I would tell him when to stop as a sign of how much I liked him," said one interviewee。
3. 暗示測(cè)試
接下來(lái)還有間接暗示測(cè)試，也就是對(duì)于一段認(rèn)真的感情開玩笑，通過(guò)身體接觸給予暗示使感情升溫。“我們逐漸變得浪漫的時(shí)候，他對(duì)我的身體接觸也越來(lái)越大膽。首先，他的胳膊搭在我的肩頭，然后手慢慢移過(guò)來(lái)，他等著我喊停，通過(guò)他與我的距離判斷我有多愛他。”一位受訪者說(shuō)道。
4. Miss me?
Distance is supposed to make the heart grow fonder, and indeed physical separation is a common test. One respondent admitted: "To see if our relationship was really strong I tested it by going overseas for a few months."
4. 想我嗎?
距離產(chǎn)生美，因此與相愛之人分開也是一項(xiàng)常見測(cè)試。一位受訪人認(rèn)為他測(cè)試他倆關(guān)系是否鞏固的方法就是出國(guó)，和對(duì)方分離幾個(gè)月。
If you have felt like you didn't want to be the first to call, you could be using another separation test called initiation induction. "When I returned from Switzerland, he didn't call me even though he knew exactly when I was returning. He wanted to see if I still felt the same way about him by calling him first," one woman recalls。
如果你不想成為先打電話的那個(gè)人，你可以采取另外一個(gè)分離測(cè)試，這項(xiàng)測(cè)試叫做初始感應(yīng)。一位女士回憶說(shuō)：“當(dāng)我從瑞典回國(guó)的時(shí)候，他并沒有給我打電話，雖然他清楚知道我回來(lái)的時(shí)間。他想知道我是否能和他想法一樣并首先打電話。”
5. Heart to heart
The directness test is really the opposite of a secret strategy. Far more popular with men than women, it involves either asking a person straight out how they feel, or speaking openly about yourself in the hope your love interest will too。
5. 心對(duì)心交流
直接測(cè)試與秘密測(cè)試剛好相反。男性采用這種測(cè)試方法的頻率遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)高于女性。這樣的測(cè)試方法包括直接問(wèn)別人他們的感覺或者開誠(chéng)布公地和自己有感覺的那位交談。
"I was having trouble getting him to open up to me about his family and his background," one woman said, "so I started talking about my folks and sisters, hoping that he would reciprocate and tell me about himself as a sign that he trusted me and wanted me to know more about him."
一位女性表示：“想和我那位開放地聊聊他的家庭和背景非常困難，所以我首先和他介紹一下我的家庭和姐妹，希望他能和我交換意見，與我聊他的情況，以此讓他相信我，也想讓我多了解他。”
6. Inside information
Ever tried to find out from someone's friends whether they might have a crush on you? Then you have employed what Baxter and Wilmot aptly call asking third party tests. It might sound like playground behaviour, but grown-ups do it too。
6. 內(nèi)部信息
你是否想知道別人的朋友是否喜歡你?那你可以試試巴克斯特和威爾莫特所定義的第三方測(cè)試。這聽起來(lái)也許像是小朋友的游戲行為，但是大人們也這樣做。
